The Drive-By

A few posts back I wrote about pondering how to forgive someone who had wounded myself and my children who was terminally ill and then I also wrote about writing her a note in an attempt to take the high road and mend bridges for my kids sake.

Let me explain this…..The main floor of our home has an open floor plan with windows pretty much going around the entire length of the home. I had real wood window blinds installed when we moved in to match the wood floors and every morning when I wake the first thing I do is open all the wood blinds to let the light in and reveal a panoramic view of the outside.

Friday, around noon as I am cleaning up my lunch in the kitchen which is in the back of the main floor I can just make out a black car turning down the east end of our street. By the time I reach the dining room, it should have well passed me if it was doing the speed limit, which makes me notice that it moving slow as if it is looking for something. I walk into the bathroom and rinse my hands, which is behind one of the only walls that block my view of the front of the house and when I come out, the black car is directly in front of my house. I start to walk to the middle of the floor so that I can have a better view but not so much that I am standing directly in front of a window, because now I’m curious what is going on. There are two occupants in the car, two women and it’s obvious they are looking for something. The one in the passenger seat is pointing….at my house.
Why are they looking for my house?
The car pulls into my driveway. Just as quickly, I think… is that her car?

Before I can make it out the door, the car is gone. I can’t be certain that it was her, but I don’t think it’s a coincidence that within a week of writing the note that she would respond. After all…she now has my address.

Randomly, today I also found out her best friend, The Instigator, as we all call her, is in town from North Carolina and its only logical that she would be the driver.

What I do find odd is that it seems she came to my house in the middle of the day, not knowing I’ve been laid off and when she saw my car in the driveway or maybe even saw me, she bailed.

Is she just wanting to know where the kids live – that they’re ok, well cared for? I don’t get it. Knowing The Instigator may have been with her makes me question her intentions and wonder what to expect. It also makes me wonder if I’ve just made a huge mistake and opened the door to a whole bunch more heartache for the kiddos.

Ugh. No good deed goes unpunished.

The Note

I’ve decided the best way to deal with this situation concerning my terminally-ill ex-mother-in-law is to just say what I feel and mean what I say, in the most simplistic of ways and let her take it from there.
Really, that’s all I can do.


I don’t know how to start this note or where it might end I guess I just feel that God has put it on my heart to write for awhile now. I don’t think I could ever reconcile the truth of what we have lived in the past few years with what you have been told. I just think it has been terribly unfair to you and I but especially the kids. I just want you to know that we really care about you, immensely. We love you and if you ever want to stop by and talk or talk about nothing at all, the kids would like that, I would too, and the door is always open. Ball’s in your court.