“you’re stronger than me”

I’ve had this said to me so many times by a man, I’ve lost count.

At first, it sounds like a compliment. No, at first it is a compliment. They admire it. It’s intriguing. They even take pride in it when they talk about how strong I am to others.

But let me tell you what happens. They stop admiring it. It becomes a bar set too high when they would rather go numb. They “shh” me because they can’t find their own words. They call me “crazy” because to examine their own feelings looks a lot like work they can’t get credit for in a paycheck.

Then it turns to: “I’m just not strong enough for you. You deserve better” and they jump ship.

Here’s the thing: you get stronger when the only option you have is to be strong. If the opt out/greener grass option remains available to you, you’re never going to get strong enough. Unless, you WANT to do the work. Guys, a lot of you are still praying for things that you could have long since accomplished, had you not turned your nose up when the opportunity was given to you because it looked more like work, than a blessing bestowed upon you.

May it be of benefit to someone because it just hurts my heart a whole lot tonight.

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