Letters I meant to send

Just because I’m your relative, doesn’t mean you can act like a child and give me the cold shoulder on account of you not getting your way. 

I AM NOT YOUR PERSONAL, DISPOSABLE SCAPEGOAT.

Also, If you assume I’m okay with you treating our parents like garbage, or my kids as a nuisance to your life then you must not know me at all. Yes, I see you rolling your eyes at mother and how you resent our father’s efforts to guide you. No, there isn’t ANY justifiable reason for you to cuss at our parents over my child’s birthday cake. I have been tolerant and held my tongue too long.

I am fed up with hearing you pass judgement and blame on mother, father, myself, our extended family, your friends, your colleagues … your  landlord , any scapegoat will do; and of course, everyone else but yourself – for every wrong thing that has ever happened in your life. People can have relationships with friends and family fade without the drama. Fine, there’s no love or respect lost for you here, we get it. You can be superior to us all, but please know that your profound inability to empathize with anyone or anything that doesn’t benefit you in some way was never lost on us. Bad behavior should not be overlooked simply because you act out on people who love you. Being related to someone does not give you a free pass to hurt them. Being hurt in the past by someone you hold dear is not justification to hurt anyone else in the future. Everything isn’t about you and yes, you are still accountable for all the pain you’ve inflicted, no matter how you feel. No manipulations, no crocodile tears, no emotional blackmail. 

Pain should not be a legacy, and we as relatives should know better than to force someone to inherit our stressors and traumas, ESPECIALLY our children.

I love you, always have and always will. However …

Our love isn’t a shield that protects you from reprisal when you disrespect us

One thought on “Letters I meant to send

  1. I’m so sorry u have to go thru this….. it’s definitely a messed up situation, and totally unfair and uncalled for. It’s time for her to be a grown up and accept responsibility for herself and her actions. Love u, girl

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