there’s no getting off.
its a never-ending cycle of shit that you’re supposed to survive.
but surviving isnt living.
i want to believe there’s more than angst to be felt. that people truly care.
but i dont. i dont believe in much of anything anymore. not even myself.
i dont believe that theres a reason for everything. bad shit just happens. a lot. and as much as people tell you that they’ll be there and always love you, they usually arent and dont. they love you when its convenient for them. when it means accepting a difference of opinion or going out of the way, people let their selfish pride rule. they tell themselves they’re too busy, they dont “owe you”. truth is for all the shame we feel over a life lost to suicide, very few people actually care enough to save a life when push comes to shove.
hell, maybe nobody is worth saving. if “god” cant get off his ass to save the lives of children dying and return them whole bodied to their grief stricken, heartbroken mothers, who the hell else is worth it?
how do you keep riding this ride?