It’s been 6 months since I wrote anything here, which flat-out stuns me. There used to be a time when all I did was write here. It hasn’t really been that there isn’t anything for me to write about. i just had to make my peace with writing in a more censored way than I was used to. At some point in the near future, I imagine that won’t be the case anymore.
So what has gone on for the last 6 months of my life? LOTS!
Last post: I got engaged. Didn’t really see that one coming. I mean I did. We talked about it, we had even played around in a jewelry store a few times just pointing out things and talking about the future. Then the ring came. A lot of people have asked me how I could have moved on so quickly after everything I’ve been through and if I have any doubts, but the honest to God truth is that I don’t have a single doubt. I have doubts about marriage, love and life in general, but not about him and even those tend to fade into the background where he is concerned. What has happened, happened. There really isn’t a damn thing I would’ve done differently. I know that. I accept the past exactly as is and I’m just ready to move on with my life. The future looks bright.
There are still messes from the past that are being cleaned up. The whole explosion of events from last summer have led to a court calendar I didn’t want. The last hearing is scheduled for April 18th. What it boils down to at this point is that there have been a slew of professional and evaluators in our lives since then and they have ALL determined, in a short summary, that the El Chupa Douchebag is a douchebag who is more interested in being a victim than he is in being a father to his children.
He has been reduced to supervised visits, every other Sunday for two hours, if the kids decide to go. Recently they have developed more disdain in regards to this situation because the time that he does have with them, he has used to bad mouth me and defend himself with lies, which even in their immature mind, recognize are not true, only furthering all the frustration they feel. He calls about twice a week. The kids can usually tolerate about 2-5 minutes before they’ve had enough. It’s sad, but I guess for now that’s the way it’s got to be. At least I hope it’s only for now. I would like to blame it all on Stankcy. I don’t think she’s a nice person and I believe she is actually playing all the head games he once accused me of playing. Ironic, huh? I dunno. Believe me, I’ve pretty much beat my head to a pulp trying to find a solution that end results with him being an exemplary parent. My best friend, Beavis, says sometimes that solution is just good-bye.
Fortunately, there’s been a man in their life who has stepped up to the title of father without any head banging or prompting and this seems to be making a world of difference.
Despite all this, the kids are doing great.
School is going great. Looks like I’ll be graduating with my Bachelors in Legal Studies come next summer and my career in the legal spectrum has really taken off. I like my job. I could love it. I love some of the people I work with….others I could just do without. I can’t tell you what a difference it makes to get a bit of notice for all your hard work and to have people tell you how above and beyond they think you perform in your role, even if it’s never your boss.
If you had told me 3 years ago that this would be my life, I’d probably have punched you in the face, but surprise, surprise, I’m finally where I want to be in my life story, just with different scenery, plot and characters.