Will it ever end?

This weekend, Jer and I started sorting through stuff in the basement and trying to get it cleaned up and organized. It’s nice to be sitting here at a grown-up desk, at a new computer, with all my work stuff organized and in it’s place. Very nice.

However, while digging through the basement – I came across some things that I had kept as keepsakes for the kids. Holding the outfits that I brought Jedi and Diva home from the hospital in swept me up in a flood of emotions I wasn’t prepared for. I found a file of stuff from EL Chupa’s first divorce and records I kept of all the horrible things the EggDonor put Pickle through. It stung a little, realizing how much work I did, to end up here. Somehow it just doesn’t seem right that after everything I’ve done that I should be treated with such disdain. Scratch that – it isn’t right – period. what should be happening is that El Chupa and I should be putting ourselves aside, we should be respecting each other as the other parent of our children, and showing our children that even though marriages ends, love can go on in a different way, by being friends with each other’s best interest and ultimately our children’s best interest at heart. But instead all I’m getting is down right ridiculous, immature and petty behavior.

3 thoughts on “Will it ever end?

  1. Don’t call him.
    And if he can’t come and get HIS children, then he doesn’t get to see them.
    It’s easy.
    He has to make some kind of effort, Steph.  And if he doesn’t, at least you know that your children are safe with YOU.
    Communicate with notes.  Leave instructions for medications in note form, explicit instructions, all that.  Do NOT call him to remind him of anything.  When you do call to speak to your kids, ask Devon if medicine was given, etc.  He’s old enough and responsible enough to know that these things must happen.  Also, get all three kids into therapy as soon as possible.  Think of yourself as a single mom. You are, if you really think about it.  And if that mother fucker is a second late with his child support, report him.  Report everything he does to your lawyer.  And file for no visitations without supervision.
    I know it seems harsh, but you’ve been too nice for too long.  He’s bad mouthing you to your kids by telling them that he can’t do things because you’re there.  He’s at fault. 
    You have to stop calling his mother.  I know you’re trying to do what’s best for your kids, but it seems to me that he’s using it as ammo against you.  Just stick to the note writing.  If he decides he wants to see his children, good for him.  If not, well, it’s better that he isn’t involved with them anyway.  He’s a shitty person.  I’m sorry you married him.  I’m glad you have J. in your life to make things better.  He isn’t a shitty person.

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