Dark – Feb 22, 2006

I’m lost in something right now that I can’t quite explain, bt I had this complete feeling of hopelessness this afternoon. I felt like the world was coming down around me and the only way out was, well the only way out.

I actually thought to myself that I was going to cut my wrists. I envisioned myself doing it. What I would use, what it would feel like. All the blood around me.

I felt completely alone.

I crumbled to the floor, pulled at my hair and broke into a sob.

I realize people have faced worse. That is what gets me out of it, sometimes I just really want to surrender. I don’t want to be responsible for anything or what will happen when I’m gone.

I want all of this to be someone else’s burden.

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