Whatcha talkin bout?

WARNING:  RANT AHEAD!!!

OK folks, here’s a little announcement for all of you judgmental whores who like to cast disapproving glances at complete strangers in stores because their 2 year old child is not behaving in a way that you would deem appropriate…

#1- No matter what I do, I can’t win with you. If I ignore my two year old and continue shopping, you will shake your head anyways and GOD FORBID! if I should try to discipline my daughter in public by saying “Stop it NOW!” in a stern voice or smacking her butt…cause then you’d really disapprove.

#2-My child having a temper tantrum in the middle of the store DOES NOT render me a bad parent. Please try and save the effort of your disgusted look for say a prostitute or something. This is pretty freakin typical of any child but especially one who is two years old and didn’t get a nap.

#3- She might have gotten a nap if I hadn’t been busy being a VOLUNTEER coach for both of my son’s baseball teams and my husband wasn’t required to be on call one week a month. I think I can deal with the sacrifice of a nap and it’s consequences if it means that I can participate in my other children’s lives, creating memories and building their confidence through playing sports and my husband is able to do what he has to to provide for our family.

#4- Children have bad days even with a nap. Sometimes they have colds, sometimes they’re going through a phase, sometimes their two, sometimes their just being plain ornry. An observation of my child for 5 mins, 5 hours or even 5 days would not render your opinion valid cause you still wouldn’t know them. You don’t see them when they come into my room in the morning and stand by my bed and say “Good Morning, Mommy.” and kiss my cheek. Or how if I stub my toe and cry they pat my back and say “It’s ok, Mommy.

Don’t ever assume to know my children or what’s best for them. That’s my job and I take it very seriously.

Thank-you.

Yucks and better stuff

I get so tired of having things wrong with me. I swear to God, it always seems like it’s one thing after another.

For one thing….I’m sick of bloodwork. It’s getting old. At this point I can tell a nurse what arm, what vein, what kind of needle, and what colored top tube she’ll need depending on what month we’re in and what test are being ran. That’s just sad.

I have AT LEAST one day every week where I am in the shittest ot all shitty moods. It’s like sporadic PMS all month long. And then I have been getting migraines again. Just out of nowhere BAM! migraine. Usually accompanied by excrutiating pain in the right side of my neck. Last night a really lovely migraine sent me to bed at 6:30pm.

My doctor says it’s stress and that I’m pulling my shoulders up when I’m tense. But when it gets bad the only thing that helps reduce the pain is Vicadin. Which #1, makes me feel like I’m stoned and #2, makes me constipated if i have to take more than 2 doses. That might have been TMI but I’m venting here.

And then there’s the fatigue….another thing that can spring on me in a flash. At top of the hour I’m fun and ready to go, even bouncy and then….30 mins later I can barely keep my eyes open. I swear its some sort of autoimmune thing, but the doc says while I have a little of this and a little of that, it’s NOS at this point.

Know what else I’m sick of? People…    you know what, not going there.

Enough bitchin’ about my annoyances. Lets switch gears!

GOOD STUFF:

My husband and kids are well.

Only two more games of Tball left AND It’s only 80 out instead of 100, which will make coaching 4&5 years old much easier today.

Only 2 weeks til I leave for KY and get to see my family.

Dad has a REALLY good job lead.

Pickle has been seizure free since starting new meds.

Ok, now I feel a little better. Off to do something productive while I’m upbeat. Thinking I might crank some tunes to keep the mood going.

Dieting

Dieting sucks.

Really it does.

Especially when  you’re saving money for a trip and can’t afford to run to the store and buy foods that would make your life easier.

Why is produce so expensive? It’s almost cheaper to go to McDonald’s and buy a salad than it is to prepare one at home, but who goes to McDonald’s for a salad? If you’re going to be at McDonald’s it’s a little difficult to order a salad. For me hot McDonald’s fries = instant gratification. Whereas, when you’re dieting you must learn to be a pleasure delayer.

I’m not a patient person so I think, why wait to be happy when I buy clothes two sizes smaller, why not be happy now and eat the french fries now….I’ll start my diet tomorrow. You only live once right? But you might not live long!

Whwn I was pregnant with my daughter I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I did the whole diabeteic diet thing, which made a lot of sense to me, but my hormones and chemistry was so out of whack that it didn’t help and I ended up sitting with a nurse, balling my eyes out at the very notion of having to stick myself with a needle EVERYDAY, several times a day. It ended up having to test my blood sugar 6 times a day and give myself shots of insulin 4 times a day.

It wasn’t fun, but my daughter being born healthy was well worth the pricks (teehee) but….it was a wake up call.

The morning after I had her the same nurse who had set up with the meter and made me cry, came to see me and explained to me that because I had had gestational diabetes..I would be at a higher risk of developing diabetes, especially since it runs in the family. I DO NOT want to be diabetic. It sucks. Carrying around the blood tester and insulin bottles and needles and having headaches, feeling drag ass, being cranky, being thirsty all the time.

Ever since I had my daughter my blood sugar levels are fine but I seem to have developed a problem tolerating sugar, actually any refined carbs. It makes me sick as a dog.

So, for me it’s not just about the way I look or what size my clothes are. In all honesty I have NO desire to be skinny. This is about my health….my life…..living to meet my children’s children’s children. That’s important to me. So the sacrafice WILL be worth it.

BUT………. Dieting still sucks!

Random

 Englishprince28  “tagged” me to do this little test thing……

 

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Stephanie
2. Steph or Stephie
3. Mommy

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. prncstefie

2. thestephster

3. stephiemneo

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My personality
2. My smile
3. My curves

THREE THINGS YOU HATE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My waistline
2. My lack of patience

3. Being too emotional

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Something horrible happening to someone I love
2. Divorce

3. Debt

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. My wedding ring
2. Hugs from the kids
3. Dairy

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. Shirt
2. Shorts
3. Wedding ring

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS:
1. Staind
2. Led Zeppelin
3. New Kids on the Block

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS AT PRESENT:

1. Express Yourself  – Charles Wright & the Watts 103rd Street Band

2. Cool – Gwen Stefani
3. Breathe (2am) – Anna Nalick

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
1. Going away for a week without the kids
2.  Waterproofing my basement
3.  Drama-free living

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP
1. Honesty
2. Unconditional Acceptance
3.  Great sex

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I have sex 3-4x a week
2. I admire Paris Hilton
3. I can count my sexual partners on one hand

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE (OR SAME) SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Confidence – not cockiness
2. Sense of humor
3. Nice hands

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN’T DO:
1. Anal sex
2. Threesomes
3.  Eat fish

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Singing
2. Dancing
3. Getting to know people


THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Sit on my husband‘s lap (nonsexual folks)
2.  Eat another slice of my birthday cake

3. Hold a winning lottery ticket

THREE CAREERS YOU ARE CONSIDERING:
1. Guidance Counselor
2. Something involving law
3. Social Worker

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Belguim
2.
Australia
3. Bahamas

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Meet my great-grandchildren
2. Become wealthy enough to provide for my family even after I’m gone
3. Let everyone know how much I love them

Birthday

I had a really great birthday.

I finally got to watch the “Strip Search” season finale’ which I had recorded. My friend Bev called and sang Happy Birthday to me, even though she had been up all night with her sick little boy. Then my Daddy brought me breakfast from my favorite cafe. My Mom picked me up and took me to drool over another hot guy…..Brad Pitt, in Mr. & Mrs. Smith. It was a very good romantic comedy. Ok, a dark romantic comedy. Then I got to go do something else I never get to do….SHOP!

FOR MYSELF!

I went ot JCPenney’s and got a couple new outfits and my mother paid for them which made it even more enjoyable. Came home and we got pizza from my favorite pizza place and had dinner with my husband, the kids, my parents, my lil’ sis and my mother & father-in-law.

My husband got me the sweetest card.  I have to share it cause it made me cry. It read:

FOR MY WIFE, MY BEST FRIEND

You’ve been there to laugh with me, to cry with me, to be proud of me, and to be happy for all the good things in my life…

You’ve also shared my disappointments and listened as I worked out my thoughts and feelings about so many things that troubled me…

You’re the most important part of my world, and you always will be.

I love you. Happy Birthday.

Then he signed it:

Stephanie, I love you with all my heart. You’re the best friend anyone could ever ask for.

My in-laws got me a shopping card for Wal-Mart and I’m sure I can find SOMETHING there that I could buy. Husband‘s Grandma just called and sang “Happy Birthday” to me, which is an essential part to any birthday now. If Grandma doesn’t call and sing something just doesn’t seem right.

Now, I’m off for a hot, bubble bath and a candle lit rendevous with my husband.

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. 

My Birthdate Meaning

 







Your Birthdate: July 27
Your birth on the 27th day of the month (9 energy) adds a tone of selflessness and humanitarianism to your life path. Certainly, you are one who can work very well with people, but at the same time you need a good bit of time to be by yourself to rest and meditate. There is a very humanistic and philanthropic approach in most of things that you do. This birthday helps you be broadminded, tolerant, generous and very cooperative. You are the type of person who uses persuasion rather than force to achieve your ends. You tend to be very sensitive to others’ needs and feelings, and you able to give much in the way of friendship without expecting a lot in return.


 

 

Random Thoughts

::::edit::::


Seems that everyone who means anything to me is going through hard times right now and it hurts my heart. Though I’m short of advice and help…I am thinking of all of you, always.

I just finished having a tearful conversation with my sister.  I hate when my little sister cries. I wish I had something better to say.


 Why do things have to be so complicated?


———————————————————–


My Mom has offered to take me to see a movie tomorrow afternoon for my birthday.  I’m guessing Wedding Crashers wouldn’t be appropriate, I’d rather see Charlie & the Chocolate Factory with my boys, my Mom and I both are rather put off by Tom Cruise at the moment, so I don’t know what to see.


Any suggestions?


———————————————————-


Today is predicted to be the hottest day of the year here in Ohio.


Just thinking that it is gonna be any hotter today than it was yesterday ….. makes me miserable, cause yesterday it was just plain nasty. About 94 and so humid you feel like you’re going to choke on the air. I’m thrilled, really.

Why is it ok for guys to take off their shirts anywhere they want, but not women? I mean, I know it’s the whole boob thing, but c’mon God only gave them to us for breastfeeding. ( Yes guys it’s true…..we weren’t actually graced with them JUST for your playful pleasure)


 I think I may go become a nudist somewhere today. Or at the very least, I’ll get in touch with my inner child and get in the kiddie pool.


—————————————————


My daughter just came up to me with all of my rings on her fingers.


“Look Mommy…..bootiful.”

Crazy?

How many times do you take a shot at something before you give up?


Isn’t the definition of insanity when you do the same thing over and over again with the belief that there will be a different outcome when it has always produced the same results before?


What do you let take precedent when you need to make a decision and your heart and your head are not in sync?


((((sigh))))


Ok…..


Here’s the deal.


My cousin, Li, sent me an e-mail this morning.


She asked if it would possible for us to sit down and talk things out privately when I make my visit to KY next month.


Now, I am all for finding a resolution to the situation as a whole….I’m willing to sit down and listen and I’d be kidding myself if I didn’t admit that I would like to confront her face to face about some things, not that I would be mean, but you know….when things go down….you want an explanation. At first I thought, well even if she’s totally fake to me, if she can be in the same room with me without causing any added stress to the family then it’s worth it. Then a part me thought – she wouldn’t go through the trouble of trying to sit down with me and giving me the opportunity to say what I want IF she was just going to be fake about it. BUT, then I thought well maybe she’s just trying to clean her conscience, she’ll say what she wants and go on thinking the same things about me but being nice to my face. Then I think I’ll just be honest and be myself and if she doesn’t then whatever. As long as I can live with my own actions, but then I thought what was the point at all if she already has her mind made up to think ill of me?????


But she’s given me her word to have open ears, mind and heart.


That’s all I can ask for and I’ll put my own reservations aside and hope for the best.

I am having a KICK ASS weekend!

First off, Sherwood and Jo got in last night and they brought us all kinds of goodies. Sherwood brought me up a 17” flat panel computer monitor, Jo got me some of my favorite Victoria’s Secret lotion (she didn’t even know it was my fav).They also brought me fresh blueberries (my fav) from their farmer’s market and got the husband field peas (his fav – he’s weird). They brought the kids this big inflatable pool that’s big enough for all of them to get in. They got them bubbles and a keyboard with microphones, an ant farm, some horseshoes and some really cool Disney Store shirts. It’s so great to have them here and isn’t because they brought stuff with them. I like Jo, Sherwood’s fiance’, a lot better than his ex-wife.

It is very weird to watch the husband and Sherwood together though because they look so much alike.

Plus, everything got worked out yesterday so that I can go to Jason’s wedding next month. Since Jason’s wedding is in Indiana and it just so happens that most of my Mom’s family lives about 2 hours away in Kentucky. So now Mom is going to go with me, husband and Baby Girl to visit with everybody and since we are going to drive her up, which she was really excited and grateful for, she will babysit her while we drive to the wedding. It also just happens to be the same weekend that my cousin will be there with her daughter and my Aunt and her brother, who lives in New Mexico, will be up with his girlfriend too. So I will get to see EVERYBODY!!! And to top it all off, we won’t have to get a hotel room because my Aunt Che is going to put my Mom up for the weekend and my Uncle said we can crash at their place. I really couldn’t have planned for this to work out any better.

Favorite part of the weekend: It just so happens that Jo really enjoys going to yard sales. So, I finally got to go this morning and made a major score! I managed to find one on those little tykes white/pink plastic toy boxes for $5!

It really doesn’t take much to make me happy.