There’s this guy in my past (who doesn’t have one???). I mentioned this before. It was in large part why I started this whole blog thing to begin with. He is someone who will always have THAT piece of me. And if I could take it back, I guess I wouldn’t. I seriously thought I would marry this guy, sometimes I STILL think about “could’ve, would’ve, should’ve”. Probably too much. You know, girl brain crap.
I still run into him online, but he made this comment to me today, insinuating that he signed on and then got off because I wasn’t on. And it made me feel special, like he was actually looking for me, he cared, he missed me. He told me he misses me, and that he thinks about me and it felt good.
How hard pressed am I for attention, affection and adoration?
And then … I got my bubble busted. Why? I don’t know. How can you have you’re bubble busted when there is no bubble? Now I just feel like an ant in a colony instead of the queen.
I guess as my best friend says, you always have a special place in your heart for your first love. He WAS my territory at one time.
Make of it what you will.